“Falling in love with yourself first doesn’t make you vain or selfish, it makes you indestructible.”

― Things I’ll teach my children (via infl4ted)

jesusinc:

I love sunglasses, am I looking at that tree? Am I staring at your dick? Who knows!

folk-punk:

dentist: *shoots you* you’re bleeding b/c you dont floss

proudlyinsane:

complete panic in one screenshot

pussylipgloss:

what a beautiful day to mind ya damn business

buckoftheirish:

tumbledore-:

gohomemccall:

my dad is a senior software engineer at Google
this is his work laptop

image

he takes it to company meetings

I’ve been told he has received many compliments

Marry him.

did
did you read the post

ven0moth:

i hate it when u sharpen ur pencil hella sharp and then right when u put pressure on it, it breaks like wtf pencil do ur job

ahobbitscourage:

do you ever check how much time there’s left of an episode just to make sure they won’t stop there

lizemeddings:

some words to live by.